Showing posts with label victors and victims. Show all posts
Showing posts with label victors and victims. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Victors Do The Work and Forget The Silver Bullets

Victors know success comes from doing the work. And that belief is even more important in tough times.

At a time when resources have to be carefully committed, and when the need to focus on getting the really important things done is crucial, the temptation to look for silver bullets is greater than ever. And there are plenty of pitchmen out there ready to sell their product of hope - and quick fixes.

I was reminded of that watching a commercial directed toward parents with relationship problems with their children. The sales pitch promises that, as a result of buying their program, parent's relationships with their children can be turned around and become positive within a day of starting the program. I'm sure the program has appeal for millions of parents with child relationship problems, and that millions of dollars are spent on this "silver bullet" - this promise of hope in overcoming a long standing and long developing problem within a short time - and with little effort. And when that program doesn't work - right away - the people who bought it feel victimized, and discouraged, and certainly poorer for the purchase.

There are lots of silver bullets that offer hope of short term, spectacular results. It's what silver bullets do best. Lose weight, increase intelligence, get six pack abs, grow hair, get your kids to love you, become more attractive - you name it, there's a silver bullet out there.

All silver bullets deal in hope - an essential ingredient to any solution. But, paraphrasing Benjamin Franklin, " If hope is what you dine on, you'll go to bed hungry."

Victors know hope is essential in the process of success, but they know you gotta do the work. So they're not fooled by the appeals to get the quick fix.

At the same time, victors realize many of these pitches and products have nuggets of truth that can help achieve success - but not within the expectation level of the sales pitch. Every book I have read, without exception, has value in it, but the real learning comes from applying the ideas gained from each of those books.

Victors know the value is in the action - in the doing. An article in Wooden Boat magazine about an Algerian boat builder who came to a workshop in the US to help him develop a maritime museum in Algeria illustrates the value of action. He is a master boatbuilder - has spent his whole life building boats. His English is not good, but he is very enthusiastic about all that he is learning - and all that he is teaching at the same time. His challenges are the result of difficulty in communicating in English - but he says, "as soon as the tool is picked up and the work starts, the learning and results begin."

Victors know doing the work is the only way to real learning and accomplishment - and success. At the beginning of Chapter 16 of Og Mandino's wonderful book titled "The Greatest Salesman In The World" is the following paragraph: " Never has there been a map, however carefully executed to detail and scale, which carried its owner over even one inch of ground." A map - a blueprint leading to a goal - are wonderful tools, but the voyage always starts with a single step - the work itself.

So that first step, then another, then another, are the key to doing the work and succeeding. Time spent looking for, being tempted by, or working on silver bullets takes away from doing the work.

In today's economic environment it's tempting to look for shortcuts to getting ahead, to surviving, to get rid of the pressure, to making progress. It's important to believe there are no shortcuts - that perspiration creates inspiration, and time and energy spent trying to get around doing the work is a waste of time.

So be a victor, not a victim. Do the work and leave the "wishin and hopin and prayin" to others. You'll be more successful for it.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com;Website:www.coxconsultgroup.com; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved

Friday, November 07, 2008

Victor or Victim - Your Choice

Right now it's tough to not feel like a victim. So many events seem to be beyond our control, and so many consequences of the decisions of others appear to have cost so many so much. It's an easy time to choose to blame others and let events just carry us along- the perfect example of a victim. And an awful lot of people will do that, and be the poorer for it. They will stop trying to swim upstream, and instead let the current carry them where it may, and they will feel out of control and blame it on things outside themselves. They are victims of events. And victims want every one else to be a victim too - it proves they're right about their own behavior. They will have chosen to be a victim - even though most would deny it.

Others choose to be victors. Faced with the same events and circumstances and consequences and outcomes as victims, they will continue to swim upstream - possibly more slowly and with more effort, but still working their way toward their goals. They know it may take longer, it may be tougher, but they choose to stand and fight, rather than let themselves be overcome by events. They take action - sometimes actions that seem so small - but they know that only action leads to results. And in doing that they often find opportunities that they couldn't have dreamed of, but exist because of the very circumstances that turn others into victims. As Steve Schiffmann says in his book Make It Happen Before Lunch, "dwell in possibility, there is always a door somewhere waiting to be opened."

Victors are optimists, opportunists, takers of action.

I was talking to a publisher of a recently launched real estate investment magazine and she admitted the market is tough right now, and many people are holding off, sitting on cash, and taking a wait and see attitude. But others are looking for alternative forms of financing, taking advantage of what they see as bargains in the market, and continuing to work their goals. Even in what is described by the media as one of the most downtrodden of markets - real estate - littered with the failures of so many - others are working and prospering. They're victors - and they will be stronger and more successful for their efforts.

Remember the aftermath of Katrina? How some people pitched right in, started clearing brush and helping others, and doing what they could to start the process of rebuilding their lives and the lives of others. Under the most difficult of circumstances - these were people who had lost everything - they put their heads down and started with action - doing something, anything, to move forward. They're victors. I have no scientific proof, but I suspect those that showed that behavior ended up getting back on track faster, and moved forward on their life's path much more quickly than those victims who waited for help - and complained when it wasn't forthcoming as fast as they expected.

The media did a disservice in the aftermath of Katrina by focusing on the bad things - the late response, the lack of organization - and made it easier for people to be victims. After all, Anderson Cooper on CNN, among others, showed how screwed up the rescue efforts were. And how could an individual, a victim of Mother Nature and FEMA, be expected to make a difference? Many didn't feel they could make a difference, and I suspect those people may be still waiting for and expecting more help. Victims rarely win - they just serve as examples of how "they" - the system, the government, the neighbors - didn't take care of them. And a major word in the vocabulary of victims is " fair" - as if there was some obligation in life for things to be "fair" - whatever that means.

To be a victor requires courage, goals that keep them pointed toward where they want to go, and an understanding that they may not be able to control all the things that happen to them, but they sure can choose how they deal with them. Victors keep control of their responses. They have their bad days - weeks - months - but they persist. And in doing so they win in the game of life.

Regardless where you are right now, choose to grab ahold of whatever it is that you really want, set your plan to get it, and act. You'll be better for it - I guarantee it.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com;Website:www.coxconsultgroup.com; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved