We hear the Babe Ruth stories about how many more strikeouts he had than home runs; Michael Jordan, and the many times he missed a critical shot; every successful salesman that has heard "No" so much more often than he has heard "Yes." Out of that comes a message that we have to fail often to succeed once. But I suspect, if you were to ask Michael Jordan, or Babe Ruth, or a top salesperson, they would all tell you they went into the batter's box, or the game, or the sale, fully expecting to succeed - to win the game, hit a home run, make the sale - every time. They didn't start from the belief that they had to fail often to succeed once.
It's a bad message - it's not true. It's one that has kept expectations down for generations of strivers, in almost every kind of life's work. Think about it - your first day on the job, and you're told to be patient, you need to pay your dues, you have to fail often to succeed once - just keep plugging away. Not too inspiring.
How about beliefs that say stay in play; persist; good things will happen to you - expect them as a result of your hard work and persistence. Believe the next sale is right around the corner. Believe you learn from every action, and apply all that growing and learning to the next opportunity. Believe failure only happens when you quit - or when you don't reach your own goals.
Studies have shown that sales trainees learning from successful salespeople with an optimistic approach achieve substantially higher sales performance faster than trainees taught by the gotta pay your dues, expect a long period of preparation, fail to succeed messages given that have held back so many people.
Which message would you want to receive - a message of possibilities, or a message that says you're going to fail often, so get used to it?
Who's to say, on that very first sales call, the new salesperson meets someone who just has to have what they are selling, and despite the lack of experience and knowledge, they connect. Is that possible? Sure it is. It happens all the time - but only to those who deal in possibilities.
This sounds like splitting hairs - it isn't. Success in any endeavor is separated from lack of success by little things. And how each possibility is approached is just a little bit different for the successful and the not so successful. One looks at it as a opportunity - I can win; the other looks at it as a jeopardy - I could lose.
The other thing that a "fail often to succeed once" message can send is that you are not worthy of success, that you are not able to achieve success. While those worms aren't true - I've never met anyone not worthy of success, and only a few people not able to achieve success, they do exist in all of us - to some degree. If you provide the fuel of "fail often to succeed once" to these two worms, your own belief in your ability and worthiness are reduced. Provide the optimistic fuel of possibilities and watch your personal beliefs and success grow.
When things are tough - and they will be tough, from time to time, the only thing that can sustain you is your own sense of possibilities, and your own sense of your worth and ability.
Listen to your own self talk. Is every at bat, every shot, every sales call an opportunity to succeed? Or is it a chance to fail? If you're looking at things pessimistically, work on the belief that the next ball gets hit out of the ballpark - the next shot wins the game, the next call has sale written all over it. Start giving yourself those positive messages and see your success grow - I guarantee it.
Written by Andrew Cox, President
Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com
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