How To Increase Your Personal Energy

Successful people have an energy about them. It's one of their most valuable resources. We asked many of the most successful people we know where they would put energy on the scale of requirements for success. All placed it in their top three. They were not talking just about physical energy, but about that hard to describe internal energy - in fact, when pressed, almost all placed internal energy above physical energy in terms of critical attributes.

How do they get and maintain their high level of personal energy?


Here's what they told us about creating personal energy.


The first thing is understanding that a high level of personal energy is a critical success factor, and then placing a high value on the things that create it - and treating the things that reduce it as enemies to success.


It's knowing that personal energy comes from within. There are external sources of stimulation that can add to energy in the short term, but the real source of personal energy is inside.


Optimism, and thinking in terms of opportunities creates personal energy. Pessimism and consequence thinking can suck the energy right out of anyone - even the most optimistic.


Good health - both physical and mental - provides the platform for high personal energy. Taking care of that health is critical. At the same time many highly successful people have overcome very difficult physical and mental issues to create the energy necessary to succeed. That's where optimism and opportunity thinking are so very critical.


It's getting up and acting that creates energy. One of our leaders attended a Hugh O'Brian Leadership Seminar when she was in high school. After the seminar she was asked what was the thing she remembered the most. Her answer was" To be enthusiastic you must act enthusiastic." Having actions control emotions creates personal energy.


Curiosity - a sense of discovery - wanting to know more - and then taking action to gain knowledge - creates personal energy. It's a key way to stay out of a rut. And remembering that the only difference between a rut and a grave is a rut's longer.


It's drawing inspiration from the accomplishments of others - and drawing strength from what they had to overcome to succeed. Reading biographies of successful people is a way many of our leaders create and renew their energy.


It's overcoming fear - today. And overcoming that little voice-demon that sits on everyone's shoulder and says "take it easy" and "be careful" and "this could be a mistake" and 'be afraid."


It's laughter and finding joy in everyday things. It's great to be able to laugh at a good joke - it's absolutely terrific to smile at the little child holding their mom's hand.


It's positive relationships - the kind that add optimism. And it's avoiding toxic relationships - the kind that pull down, create pessimism and destroy energy.


It's giving without keeping track of payback. Years ago one of our leaders was given a terrific piece of advice. "If you want to make a friend, let them do something for you." It works. We all - or at least most of us - want to give - to help.


It's realizing the toughest thing to do is to start - but once in motion, good things will and do happen. A very fit friend tells me the hardest part of a session at the gym is driving there. Once there, the exercise takes on a life of its own. Same thing with all kinds of things.


It's realizing that personal energy is a variable - from day to day the level of personal energy varies. But exerting the discipline to keep personal energy competitive on even the toughest day has its own rewards. Keeping the promises we make to ourselves creates energy.

A personal experience one of our leaders had illustrates that point.

She was working out at a gym. She'd had a bad day and wasn't feeling particularly optimistic or happy or opportunistic. As she worked to meet her time and distance goals, it became apparent that she was really laboring. The thought of just quitting started to be attractive. Then it struck her just how much her mental state of mind was impacting her level of physical performance. Her results that day were a good 10% less than normal performance. But at the end of the workout, she felt really good about overcoming those negative emotions to accomplish something she had promised herself she would do. That little demon perched on her shoulder had been trying to tell her to "give up", to "try again another day." She ignored it. A small victory. It'll be back, but she knows she can overcome it. That realization felt good - felt energizing. Action guided emotion.

Take a few moments - right now - and assess your level of energy. Then pick out one of the ways our leaders use to increase their energy levels. Laugh, smile, think about an opportunity. Discipline yourself to take action, and have that action control your emotions. Be prepared to be amazed at how your thoughts and actions can and will lift your energy level.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 PH: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: http://www.coxconsultgroup.com/; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com/

Copyright Andrew Cox 2008 All Rights Reserved

How To Create Survival Tools For Tough Times

Tough times are a big part of what makes us successful, as survivors and leaders. Getting through them effectively and positively depends on how we treat that space. Our personal survival tools go a long way to getting us through tough times. Some may call them coping tools - they're much more than that. We're talking about tools to help us stay positive and focused and optimistic.

Developing powerful survival tools starts with the realization that what you expect is what you get. Think positive expectations and get more than your share of them. But most of us are conditioned to think pessimistically - to expect the worst outcome. Take a look at all the media inputs we get every day for one major source of our negative conditioning.

So how do we overcome all the negative inputs directed at us every day, and create our own survival and success tools? The answer to that question is a very personal one - every one of us has our own unique set of experiences, perceptions, values and attitudes, and they all drive how we will create our own tools. The important thing is to create your own tools, and keep them shiny with use.

Here are a dozen suggestions from many of the leaders we have worked with that have helped them with their tough times.

Realize that "this too shall pass." During tough times it's hard to see any light at the end of the tunnel. It's there - be convinced of it - but you gotta look for it and work toward it.

Avoid negative influences and their effects - the news, the toxic people you may have to associate with, drugs and alcohol. Seek out positive people and messages - wherever you can find them.

Express your goals and expectations in positive ways - focus on where you're going, not what you want to stay away from.

Know that giving in to despair and pessimism is very human - even the most positive do that. It's the overcoming of those emotions through action that lifts you up.

Ask for help. Realize that the highest order of relationships is interdependence. Most people are anxious to give - if we let them know by asking. We can't assume others know what is going on in our heads - they don't.

Give without calculating return. Nothing can help to get through tough times more than helping someone else get through their tough times. Giving comes in so many different ways - but you know it when you see it.

Don't compare. It's easy to fall into the trap of seeing others who seem to be on top of the world, and feeling envious toward them. A human emotion, but destructive. Realize that everyone of us carries around our own burdens - who are we to judge the weight of another's?

Kick start every day by creating positive space. A friend starts his days with high energy, positive music. He gets up with positive energy and a head start on positive emotions. I have written about Ray Stevens song "Everything Is Beautiful In Its Own Way." I hear that song and it just lifts me up - makes me smile - gives me a blast of positive energy.

Dream - just don't dream of things that never were or never will be. Dreams are a sign of hope - a precious commodity during the tough times we all face. As Rudyard Kipling wrote in his famous poem "If" - "If you can dream, and not let dreams become your master."

Start and end every day with a success - as you define success. The very act of getting up and getting going can be a success - each of us has to define what success is. But be convinced that in every day there are the seeds of success - and look for them. Exercise is a great daily success - it's personal, requires action, and results in physical well being.

Create rewards. They don't have to be big, but they are your own recognition of a job well done - a day well spent - fears faced and overcome. Many leaders find keeping a journal of accomplishments and challenges helps them reward themselves by writing it down.

If you see ways these suggestions can help during tough times - and - by the way - during non- tough times as well, then start using them today. Not a single dollar needs to be spent in order to use any of them. And if you would like to share your own ideas, I'd welcome hearing from you.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4100; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: http://www.coxconsultgroup.com/; Blog: http/::multiplysuccess.blogspot.com

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved

Ten Ways To Make Time For The Important Things

Making time for the important things in life is a real challenge. Have you ever ended the day with the feeling that you were as busy as you could possibly be, but didn't make any progress on the really important things? Have you been resentful of the time and energy you have to spend on meeting the demands of others? Have you ever felt out of control - that outside forces take up all your time - and you feel like a victim?

Here are ten ways you can make time for the really important things in your life.

1 - Decide what is really important to you. The 3 to 5 most important things in your life - no more than that.. This sounds so simple - and so easy. It isn't. I challenge you to sit down and write out the 3 to 5 most important things you want to accomplish in your life. Most people won't do that. It takes time and focused thought - but it is the single best investment of time you can make.

2 - Make what's important to you the foundation of your goals. Then align your goals with the requirements of those people, institutions, organizations that are important to you and can contribute to your success. This requires a shift in thought from feeling imposed on by others to seeing the requirements of others as contributing to your success. Making that mind shift can be the most liberating thing you can ever do.

3 - Adopt a "good enough" habit of thought toward the the things you must do but that are not part of your top goals. Trying to make everything the "best possible" sounds laudable - but it's a sure recipe for failure. "Best possible" and perfection can literally suck up all the time you've got, and for things that aren't really that important.

4 - Place a high value on creating structure and limiting your choices. See them as positive behaviors in your battle to preserve as much of your time as you can for the important few. Set boundaries of time, energy and money around the less important.

5 - Create a habit of thought that allows you to replace instinctive reaction with considered response. It's very easy, and lazy, to wait for an outside stimulus to create response. It's hard to sort out and choose response - but critical to your own success.

6 - Learn to say "No." There will always be demands on your time in excess of the time you have available, and while the demands of others may be good for them, they may not be good for you. Work to act only on those demands that are a win - win. Remind yourself that the price paid for having too much to do and too little time is that nothing gets done to even a "good enough" level.

7 - Make routine, predictable and structured all the "good enough" stuff. To the extent that you create routines, the focus of your thoughts and actions can be used for the important stuff. It's amazing how much real thought and planning and decision making can be accomplished while performing the routines of mowing the lawn, raking the leaves, doing the dishes....... A friend who travels a lot on business sees routines as his close friends - they keep him supplied with all his day to days, and allow him to focus on the important things. An example - he always parks his rental car under a light post while traveling - always. Why? It's easier to find it if he forgets where he parked it. Simple - effective.

8 - When it comes to the really important things, forget "multitasking." A focused hour spent on a top goal beats a day spent on "thin things." Busy is not the same as effective - often it's just an avoidance tool - it's procrastination dressed in activity.

9 - Act with enthusiasm - nothing makes things work better than energy and optimism - the belief that good things will come from our actions, and the expectation that our goals will be met and exceeded. And. if some of the routine things simply don't call for enthusiasm, then adopting a mindset of acceptance places a much higher value on accomplishing them. Saying to yourself " As soon as I've got that done - I can get on to the neat stuff" creates a reward for yourself.

10 - Enjoy the rewards of your self discipline. When the combination of the most important and the" good enough" results in your success - however you define that elusive word - take the time to celebrate.

Write down the most important things in your life, then use these ten suggestions to protect as much of your energy and time and optimism as possible. The result will be greater success in the things that matter to you most - whatever they may be.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: http://www.coxconsultgroup.com/; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com/

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved

How To Gain Optimism Through Accomplishment

Nothing creates a greater sense of optimism than accomplishment. And optimism is one of the core beliefs and attitudes of successful people. It's estimated that only 30 percent of our population are optimists, but that the majority of successful people are optimists. That estimate says that the better chance of accomplishment and success lies with the optimists.

Ask yourself these questions: When you entered into a commitment with a sense of enthusiasm and conviction, what were your accomplishments? When you entered into a commitment with hesitation, with a sense that it wouldn't work out well, what did you accomplish? Then ask yourself which of these two approaches you follow most often.

If your response was hesitation and the possibility of failure, chances are that you're missing opportunities to succeed - and accomplishment is the only real security any of us have. Read on to find ways to strengthen your ability to seek out and accomplish more in your life - in every part of it.

If your response was enthusiasm and conviction, read on for ways you can share those attitudes and beliefs with the people around you.

Here are nine recommendations:

One -Accomplishment requires putting yourself in your discomfort zone - a place where you're not secure, where you have to learn and challenge yourself. The comfort zone is the danger zone - much more dangerous than taking risk. Staying in the comfort zone keeps people from ever knowing their real abilities and worth.

Two -Accomplishment comes in many forms. It can range from a small triumph to a huge one, but what's important is that the person doing the accomplishing sees it for what it is.

Three - View situations as opportunities first. This is a real challenge for people used to thinking in terms of negative consequences. But if your first thoughts are negative, the chances of passing on real opportunity are very high. Sometimes the best thing to do with those opportunities you grabbed is to drop them - but if you don't act in the now to get them, you don't have a choice - they're gone.

Four - Accomplishment likes action - action now. Accomplishment likes ownership - standing up and taking responsibility for a situation.

Five - Be able to see your accomplishments when they happen. This might seem like a no - brainer - it isn't. For many people. their accomplishments are taken for granted - by them. They don't see their unique abilities and strengths as anything special, and so what could have been a positive reinforcement of their own personal worth and ability, goes unnoticed - by them and by others.

Six - Create goals in order to define accomplishment. State them positively - in terms of gain. Create your own personal goal culture and communicate your goals to others.

Seven - Realize that fear and doubt are as normal as breathing - they won't go away - they will be with you everyday. Enlist fear and doubt as allies. The ability to wake up every morning, deal with fear of failure, and move forward is a quality of successful people. For more on this, read Steven Pressfield's excellent book, The War Of Art.

Eight - Understand everyone else, regardless how self assured they appear, has the same doubts and concerns that you have. Know that what you are going through on the path to accomplishment is shared by others. Know you're not alone in these emotions, but are part of what successful people experience every day.

Nine - See yourself as worthy of the rewards of your efforts. See your accomplishments for what they are - an affirmation of your ability to achieve. Make those subconscious two beliefs that almost all of us share - that we are not worthy; that we are not able - shrink to nothing through personal action and accomplishment

Start today - grab ahold of some situation, project, challenge, and make it your own. Then make it happen. The possibilities are endless. But the one guaranteed outcome will be a more positive feeling about yourself earned through achievement- and isn't that a huge part of optimism?

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: http://www.coxconsultgroup.com/; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com/

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved

Leaders Know High Expectations Lead to High Performance

Leaders know high expectations lead to high performance. Leaders know that the more people believe in themselves, and their leaders believe in them, the more they will accomplish - at all levels.

We often think of leadership in terms of the Jack Welch's; the leaders of the military; the leaders of our government and institutions; the leaders of our industries. But leadership doesn't come in any particular wrapper - it shows up all over the place.

Let me share a story of real leadership:

A young girl, in second grade in a small town in Wisconsin was tested and classified as a below grade level student. That designation put her in an educational wasteland. Not much expected of her, not much effort spent on her development. Her parents discovered she had a vision problem - she had been accommodating it by memorizing everything. It caught up with her in second grade. Her parents fixed the vision problem. Her parents talked to the school, but they were firm in their decision to keep her in a below grade level class. The young girl had a hard time thinking of herself as being as good as other kids - after all, her school said she wasn't up to standard. And now she was the only kid in class with glasses.

After this young girl had completed fourth grade, her family moved to California. It was a good time to let this young girl catch her breath academically, and so she repeated fourth grade. No onus on it - she was in a completely different place.

And then the stars aligned and this young girl met the leader who would take her to a new place in her life.

Her fourth grade teacher was Mrs. Kruger. A former military nurse who had been in the South Pacific during WW II. No nonsense, firm, tough. On parents night she warned all parents to let her students be accountable for their actions. If a student forgot their lunch, don't bring it to school. They won't starve. Let the kids know they are responsible for their own actions. There were no below grade level kids in Mrs Kruger's world. The young girl did forget her lunch early in the year. She came home hungry, but she never forgot it again.

Mrs Kruger taught from high expectations. If an assignment was turned in that didn't meet her expectations for that student, they got to do it over, and over, and over - until she was satisfied that they had done their best work. The young girl was forced to redo her work often, and she didn't always like it. But the work she turned in after being forced to redo it was always better for the extra effort - and she saw that - and knew hard work resulted in accomplishment.

There was no horseplay in Mrs Kruger's class - no disrespect. She simply would not let it happen. Her class was a demanding, but safe place for her students to learn. She was energetic, critical, optimistic, and a wonderful teacher for this little girl. Her students respected and feared her - although she never threatened or used force of any kind. She just demanded her students do their best - even if they weren't convinced they could do better. And when they did, she recognized them with praise.

After a year with Mrs Kruger, this young lady had achieved a three grade level improvement in reading, writing and arithmetic. It wasn't easy - she worked really hard. But she knew she had performed - and what a change that made in her feelings about herself.

From that start - from that year with Mrs Kruger, this young woman went on to Honors Level classes in high school, to graduating from Boston College, and to getting her Masters in Special Education from Simmons College in Boston.

We're very proud of our daughter- and we're very thankful that she had the opportunity to spend a year of her young life learning from Mrs Kruger - a true leader.

There are so many qualities that a leader may possess - but the qualities of optimism; of demanding and expecting the best; of rewarding accomplishment; rank at the very top of the leadership list.

Take a look at how much you expect from yourself - and from others. If there is room for improvement, think of this story of Mrs Kruger, who made such a difference in our daughter's life - and then go out and make it happen.

Do it today. We all can be Mrs Kruger in our own way.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: http://www.coxconsultgroup.com/; Blog: http://multiplysuccess.blogspot.com/

Copyright 2007 All Rights Reserved

Fail Often To Succeed - Says Who?

I don't know who started it, but the idea that you must fail in order to succeed didn't do anyone any favors. Unfortunately, it's become a firmly imbedded belief in the hearts and minds of millions.

We hear the Babe Ruth stories about how many more strikeouts he had than home runs; Michael Jordan, and the many times he missed a critical shot; every successful salesman that has heard "No" so much more often than he has heard "Yes." Out of that comes a message that we have to fail often to succeed once. But I suspect, if you were to ask Michael Jordan, or Babe Ruth, or a top salesperson, they would all tell you they went into the batter's box, or the game, or the sale, fully expecting to succeed - to win the game, hit a home run, make the sale - every time. They didn't start from the belief that they had to fail often to succeed once.

It's a bad message - it's not true. It's one that has kept expectations down for generations of strivers, in almost every kind of life's work. Think about it - your first day on the job, and you're told to be patient, you need to pay your dues, you have to fail often to succeed once - just keep plugging away. Not too inspiring.

How about beliefs that say stay in play; persist; good things will happen to you - expect them as a result of your hard work and persistence. Believe the next sale is right around the corner. Believe you learn from every action, and apply all that growing and learning to the next opportunity. Believe failure only happens when you quit - or when you don't reach your own goals.

Studies have shown that sales trainees learning from successful salespeople with an optimistic approach achieve substantially higher sales performance faster than trainees taught by the gotta pay your dues, expect a long period of preparation, fail to succeed messages given that have held back so many people.

Which message would you want to receive - a message of possibilities, or a message that says you're going to fail often, so get used to it?

Who's to say, on that very first sales call, the new salesperson meets someone who just has to have what they are selling, and despite the lack of experience and knowledge, they connect. Is that possible? Sure it is. It happens all the time - but only to those who deal in possibilities.

This sounds like splitting hairs - it isn't. Success in any endeavor is separated from lack of success by little things. And how each possibility is approached is just a little bit different for the successful and the not so successful. One looks at it as a opportunity - I can win; the other looks at it as a jeopardy - I could lose.

The other thing that a "fail often to succeed once" message can send is that you are not worthy of success, that you are not able to achieve success. While those worms aren't true - I've never met anyone not worthy of success, and only a few people not able to achieve success, they do exist in all of us - to some degree. If you provide the fuel of "fail often to succeed once" to these two worms, your own belief in your ability and worthiness are reduced. Provide the optimistic fuel of possibilities and watch your personal beliefs and success grow.

When things are tough - and they will be tough, from time to time, the only thing that can sustain you is your own sense of possibilities, and your own sense of your worth and ability.

Listen to your own self talk. Is every at bat, every shot, every sales call an opportunity to succeed? Or is it a chance to fail? If you're looking at things pessimistically, work on the belief that the next ball gets hit out of the ballpark - the next shot wins the game, the next call has sale written all over it. Start giving yourself those positive messages and see your success grow - I guarantee it.

Written by Andrew Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com

Copyright 2007 All Rights Reserved

Self Talk - Self Sabotage

Observations on self sabotage. I was just finishing a 5 mile walk at a 4 mph rate when I realized I was telling myself that wasn't much of an exercise. I was telling myself that I should have pushed harder - gone to the gym - hike in the hills - that a 5 mile walk at 4 mph on city streets wasn't really much of an exercise - because of serious back problems running is out of the question.

Then I realized I do that a lot. I minimize my accomplishments and think of them as less than what I should or could be doing.

Do you ever do that?

This input of self imposed negative messages - that we should do more, what we've done isn't that great, compared to others, we don't measure up, has the long term effect of creating in our minds a feeling of not good enough, not as good as, not really able, not really worthy. And we do it to ourselves!

Wow! A five mile walk at a good rate on a day when exercising in any form was a push because of other commitments. And then end it with a dose of self criticism for not doing more. Self sabotage at its best - or worst!

Take a look at your own self talk - see if it helps you or hinders you. If you're guilty of minimizing your own accomplishments, work on getting that kind of self talk out of your system.

It's not easy - it's a sneaky habit of thought that can get really imbedded. Start work on it by becoming conscious that you're doing it. Start today.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com.

Copyright 2007 All Rights reserved

Time and Energy - Where Do You Spend It?

Time and energy - yout two most valuable assets - and, believe it or not, the two most variable of your assets. What does that mean?

Time as an asset is less about the 24 hour clock than it is about the leverage your time provides. How much influence do you have in a day? How many other's lives and jobs do you impact every day? What are the things that steal time from you - and lower your leverage to nothing?

Think of energy as an asset. What pumps you up and allows you to focus and work at a high rate? What sucks the life right out of you - and leaves you dragging through the day?

If you're like most people, the top answer to this question is people - our ups and downs and success and failures can be traced, to the greatest extent, to our people relationships.

So, how do we use this knowledge to multiply our own success?

There are three groups of people in your universe of people - first - the 5 percent you click with from the very first time you meet. Second - the 5 percent you don't and won't click with. The third group is your group of possibilities - the vast majority of people you know - or will know.

The first group is easy - we just work well, engage well and communicate well. We want to spend time with each other - we have, as a former boss of mine put it " an ability to come to violent agreement." It becomes easy to spend a lot of our time in this group - when you find a good friend, a kindred spirit at work, a fishing buddy, a loving spouse. And then it becomes so easy to close ranks. To stay in the comfort zone these special relationships provide. And in doing that, so many possibilities for personal growth may pass you by. I don't mean to imply we should coldly calculate the time and energy spent with our special people, but I do mean to stress the need to remain open to other relationships so you can grow - and add to that special group of friends and soulmates. This special group gives you the energy to grow - to become more than you have ever been - treasure them.

The second group presents a challenge. When you meet one of your negative 5 percenters, you know it. Chances of changing the chemistry between you are are poor, but the ability to keep perspective and work effectively with the negative 5 percenters can be critical to your success. Too much time spent with or focusing on this group will suck the energy right out of you, It will take your time and make it seem as if you have none. And yet, how often do we see otherwise rational people fixate on the negative 5 percenters, to the exclusion of the other 95 percent of the population. What a waste! Let the press make their living reporting on this group - they are so good at it. And if you're working for one - get out!

Then there are the 90 percenters - the vast majority of people with whom you work and live effectively. The accomplishment that comes from working with this group can keep you pumped. Think about it. Almost all the people you will ever meet will be possible friends - effective co workers - people you can play golf with, plan with - the possibilities are endless. Your time and energy can expand exponentially with this group - all it takes is optimistic expectations and a willingness to meet other people half way - and learn in the process.

Ask yourself where you spend your time. Treasure your real friends. Then find some more of that 90 percent, and grow. And, starting right now, don't let the negative 5 percent have more than a 5 percent effect on you.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com

Copyright 2007 All Rights Reserved

The Positive Power of Music

I was was totally focused on tying a new flyfishing pattern yesterday - concentrating on getting it right.

A tune came on the radio, and, bang, just like that, I was back in Kansas City in the 60's. Driving to work on a cold rainy day in February. 5 AM - going to open the labor office for temp day laborers that was part of my Manpower Inc branch. Not looking forward to it. Life hadn't been very good for a while. My wife had been sick for a long time - in and out of hospitals. The Manpower Inc branch was stuck in low gear. I was opening the labor office because the third manager I had hired in the last year hadn't worked out - so there I was - looking forward to another 14 hour work day followed by making dinner, getting our little girls to bed, doing the laundry ---.

Then this tune came on the radio - Ray Stevens singing "Everything Is Beautiful, In Its Own Way." And suddenly everything looked a little bit brighter - a little bit more optimistic - a little more hope in my life. I can remember it as if it were yesterday. I smiled and felt a real surge of positiveness and energy and those words - "Everything is beautiful in its own way", became a sort of mantra for me. From then on, when things got tough - or tougher - I would think of that song and it helped me endure, survive, hang in there and celebrate life. Those words reminded me that there is beauty in everyone and everything - and to look for it. Wow!!

Life got better. My wife got better, our girls grew up and are beautiful, successful women with families of their own. But that special song remains as powerful a message to me now as it was then. It always will. Thanks, Ray Stevens - for your particular genius.

Do you ever notice how a song you haven't heard for years, can, as soon as you hear the first few notes, take you to a place, and have you singing the lyrics as if it were just yesterday when it was popular? I marvel at our ability to keep those special tunes in special places and bring them out with the tiniest of promptings. To me that speaks to the power of music, but more to our own power - our power to take a message, accept it, make it our own, and have it with us the rest of our lives.

I keep looking for those messages of optimism and hope, and those messages that take me back and remind me how far I've come in life. I hope you do that too. Life's a journey - so many little experiences that can have huge possibilities for us - listen for them.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com

Copyright 2007 All Rights Reserved

There's Plenty For Everybody - Believe it

Can you remember a time when you were really proud of what you had accomplished, and when you told a friend you got a less than enthusiastic response. - perhaps even an envious response.

I remember when my wife and I bought our first new car - a convertible - and our next door neighbor's first comment was " Well, at least our car's paid for." Nice. Scratch them from the list of friends. Envy or jealousy are really ugly behaviors - they so diminish the person guilty of them.

Stephen Covey, in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People talks about an "attitude of plenty." About believing that there is plenty of everything for everybody, and the success of another in no way diminishes us. Stephan Schiffman, in his terrific book on telephone sales, titled Make It Happen Before Lunch says" Dwell in possibility - there is always a door somewhere waiting to be opened."

If you think like Schiffman and Covey, there will be no room for the envy and jealousy that makes so many people smaller in the eyes of others - and most importantly, in their own eyes.

What's sad about the people who don't have the beliefs of plenty and possibilities, is that they believe everyone else thinks like they do. So when they do have a success, they find it difficult to accept the congratulations of others at face value, because they know, if the roles were reversed, they would harbor envy and jealousy.

Whether it's possessions, promotions, winning at a sport, or some other area of accomplishment, feel good for the success of others. Use it to inspire yourself to achieve. And if you catch yourself thinking in terms of being diminished by the success of others, tell yourself there's plenty for everybody - then go out and get some. Do it - today.

Written by Andy Cox, President

Cox Consulting Group LLC, 4049 E Vista Drive, Phoenix, AZ 85032 Ph: 602-795-4100; Fax: 602-795-4800; E Mail: acox@coxconsultgroup.com; Website: www.coxconsultgroup.com

Copyright 2007. All Rights Reserved

Optimists Lead - Pessimists Provide Input

Optimism plays a huge part in success. About 30% of us can be called optimists, and about 70% are pessimists. Put another way, about 30% of us are motivated by opportunity, and the remaining 70% are motivated by consequences - or fear of loss.

When optimists talk to other optimists, all kinds of opportunities flow - some crazy, some not. When optimists talk to pessimists, they both come away frustrated unless they value the input of their very separate beliefs, and if they do, synergy can do great things. When pessimists talk to pessimists, better bomb shelters to protect from the inevitable nuclear attack are designed and constructed.

So where do you want to be? To answer that question, start with where you are now. Question your own self talk. How do you look at opportunities - as opportunities or as something that has the threat to be screwed up and cause you a loss.

An example: In our seminars on selection of talent in organizations, one of the beliefs we ask participants to talk about is the belief that "every opening in your organization represents an opportunity to make your organization better." It's amazing how many people, when you really listen to what they believe, do not share that view. Many really think hiring is a pain in the ass - taking way too much time away from what is really important, or it is an opportunity to screw up, or they really don't want to be involved - the "just send me a body approach."

Two events motivated me to write this particular blog. The first is the TV ad that shows the guy perched on a bridge spanning a river with a pair of homemade wings strapped to his arms. It's set in what appears to be 1700's Europe. He screws up the courage to jump off the bridge and he glides. The crowd gasps and says " He flies". An old man passing by says, "Yes, But he can't swim!" And the next thing we see is the man crashing into the river. Bummer. Wish he had thought of that before taking the "plunge" over open water.

The second event is an ongoing one for me. A writer named Jon Talton is the business section op-ed writer for our paper - The Arizona Republic. He has to be the most pessimistic, dismissive writer I have ever experienced. There isn't a good piece of news about the local, state, or national economy that he can't dismiss, discount or minimize. Reading him must be some form of perverse pleasure for me - I always come away with less enthusiasm than I had before reading his latest attempt at throwing cold water on good news.

My point in both of these events is to show how varied pessimism can be , and how draining it can be as well. Think about applying for a job where the hiring manager thinks selection is a pain in the ass. Maybe you've been there. Think about having someone rain on your new promotion with an observation that the company is going to hell in a handbasket and is close to failure. The effect - energy drained, passion smothered and a promise to avoid this negative influence in the future.

Listen to your own self talk - do you see the glass half empty or half full. Is your first instinct to define why something won't work, or is it to greet the idea as valuable and worth more thought? As a salesperson, are you more concerned with meeting quota and keeping your job, or with finding that next possibility that will keep you on the road to success?

Give it some thought - value both pessimists and optimists - we sure need both. Just make sure you look for your share of opportunities.